“Something Worse
Than Not Being Forgiven”
Someone has wisely reported the following: “
There is something worse than not being forgiven and that is _______________.”
Please open your Bible with me to the story of the man who revealed that there is something worse than not being forgiven. It’s found in II Samuel chapter fourteen.
Have you discovered that life is more about how you treat others than how you are being treated?
The story of II Samuel chapter fourteen is one that is repeated time after time in homes across the globe. Here is what happened.
King David’s oldest son, Amnon, has committed an extremely wicked sin. He has sexually assaulted his half-sister Tamar and, as a direct result, another son of David, his third son, Absalom, has murdered Amnon.
Amnon has now fled Jerusalem and lives with a family member some 35 miles away. He’s now living with his grandparents in the town of Geshur, a part of modern-day Golan Heights (present day population 300). And, for all practical purposes, David does nothing to deal with Absalom. In a word, Absalom is banished from the palace. (II Sam 3:3). Now, it appears that David was unwilling to forgive his son Absalom for taking the life of Amnon. But there is something that is worse than not forgiving someone. I’d like you to see it here in this passage.
The passage revolves around a woman pretending to have a huge problem that only the king can solve. Let’s see what she says to King David, verse one.
II Samuel 14:1 “Now Joab the son of Zeruiah perceived that the king's heart was toward Absalom.
(2) And Joab sent to Tekoah, and fetched thence a wise woman, and said unto her, I pray thee, feign thyself to be a mourner, and put on now mourning apparel, and anoint not thyself with oil, but be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead:
(3) And come to the king, and speak on this manner unto him. So Joab put the words in her mouth. (4) And when the woman of Tekoah spake to the king, she fell on her face to the ground, and did obeisance, and said, Help, O king.
(5) And the king said unto her, What aileth thee? And she answered, I am indeed a widow woman, and mine husband is dead. (6) And thy handmaid had two sons, and they two strove together in the field, and there was none to part them, but the one smote the other, and slew him.
(7) And, behold, the whole family is risen against thine handmaid, and they said, Deliver him that smote his brother, that we may kill him, for the life of his brother whom he slew; and we will destroy the heir also:
and so they shall quench my coal which is left, and shall not leave to my husband neither name nor remainder upon the earth.”
Joab, remember, is the General of the Israeli army. He’s also, by the way, a nephew of King David. He sees that David is doing nothing to deal with Absalom, let alone restore him. And often in families when sin occurs between family members, relationships are drastically affected.
Most people, for some strange reason, have an easier time developing and even restoring relationships with those outside their family than inside it. This really is the exact opposite of God’s plan.
One of the main reasons for a family is this matter of relationships. And, as we all know, the goal is not the change others, but to learn how to change ourselves and especially to change yourself in order to solve interpersonal problems, which inevitably happen in every single family. But, again, as we all know, most of us look outside of ourselves for the cause of our family problems, but to no avail. It’s God’s way to get us to see ourselves for what we truly are. Then, as He changes us, He can use us to affect the lives of our family members.
Now, David has the ability to administrate and oversee an entire nation; and that, very well. David even has the ability to advance his kingdom; to go to war and to conquer other lands. Yet, he has no ability to administrate and oversee his own family.
And with the number of problems we see in David’s family, do we see him looking in on his own heart to see what God requires him to change in order for his family to respond to him? No, it doesn’t appear that way.
There is something worse than not being forgiven and that is _______________.”
Please open your Bible with me to the story of the man who revealed that there is something worse than not being forgiven. It’s found in II Samuel chapter fourteen.
Have you discovered that life is more about how you treat others than how you are being treated?
The story of II Samuel chapter fourteen is one that is repeated time after time in homes across the globe. Here is what happened.
King David’s oldest son, Amnon, has committed an extremely wicked sin. He has sexually assaulted his half-sister Tamar and, as a direct result, another son of David, his third son, Absalom, has murdered Amnon.
Amnon has now fled Jerusalem and lives with a family member some 35 miles away. He’s now living with his grandparents in the town of Geshur, a part of modern-day Golan Heights (present day population 300). And, for all practical purposes, David does nothing to deal with Absalom. In a word, Absalom is banished from the palace. (II Sam 3:3). Now, it appears that David was unwilling to forgive his son Absalom for taking the life of Amnon. But there is something that is worse than not forgiving someone. I’d like you to see it here in this passage.
The passage revolves around a woman pretending to have a huge problem that only the king can solve. Let’s see what she says to King David, verse one.
II Samuel 14:1 “Now Joab the son of Zeruiah perceived that the king's heart was toward Absalom.
(2) And Joab sent to Tekoah, and fetched thence a wise woman, and said unto her, I pray thee, feign thyself to be a mourner, and put on now mourning apparel, and anoint not thyself with oil, but be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead:
(3) And come to the king, and speak on this manner unto him. So Joab put the words in her mouth. (4) And when the woman of Tekoah spake to the king, she fell on her face to the ground, and did obeisance, and said, Help, O king.
(5) And the king said unto her, What aileth thee? And she answered, I am indeed a widow woman, and mine husband is dead. (6) And thy handmaid had two sons, and they two strove together in the field, and there was none to part them, but the one smote the other, and slew him.
(7) And, behold, the whole family is risen against thine handmaid, and they said, Deliver him that smote his brother, that we may kill him, for the life of his brother whom he slew; and we will destroy the heir also:
and so they shall quench my coal which is left, and shall not leave to my husband neither name nor remainder upon the earth.”
Joab, remember, is the General of the Israeli army. He’s also, by the way, a nephew of King David. He sees that David is doing nothing to deal with Absalom, let alone restore him. And often in families when sin occurs between family members, relationships are drastically affected.
Most people, for some strange reason, have an easier time developing and even restoring relationships with those outside their family than inside it. This really is the exact opposite of God’s plan.
One of the main reasons for a family is this matter of relationships. And, as we all know, the goal is not the change others, but to learn how to change ourselves and especially to change yourself in order to solve interpersonal problems, which inevitably happen in every single family. But, again, as we all know, most of us look outside of ourselves for the cause of our family problems, but to no avail. It’s God’s way to get us to see ourselves for what we truly are. Then, as He changes us, He can use us to affect the lives of our family members.
Now, David has the ability to administrate and oversee an entire nation; and that, very well. David even has the ability to advance his kingdom; to go to war and to conquer other lands. Yet, he has no ability to administrate and oversee his own family.
And with the number of problems we see in David’s family, do we see him looking in on his own heart to see what God requires him to change in order for his family to respond to him? No, it doesn’t appear that way.